Unearthed Jewel No. 2

Daily life gets tricky sometimes. When it gets tricky, I usually find my self using bad language. Despite my efforts not to, it happens. Today, I found another word, “Shalom.” My bother’s death left me somewhere between a sibling and an only child. Despite my truly being a sibling and longing to remain as such, I was thrust into the world of sole child and the duties that come along with it. One of those responsibilities now is caring for my mother as she ages. I am blessed to do so, but caring for her while working and raising a family can make me “sandwiched” at times. My mother has been sick for days and today it took a turn for the worst. I found myself at the doctor’s office with her close to the time I was supposed to pick up my son and drive him to a basketball game an hour and a half away. The games in which I keep the books for. While Pacing the office halls I was worrying about my mom, talking to nurses, and on the phone trying to calmly inform my son why I’m not at school to get him yet. Doing this while knowing he needs food, and not just any food… food an Autistic child will tolerate. With this collection, my daughter is in the waiting room. So much happening just as I am remembering I am supposed to pick up my eldest’s son’s medication because he was just diagnosed with the flu this morning! Let’s not forget how I just ran out of my work place without telling anyone or sighing my daughter out of school due to shear panic about my mother! My only living nuclear family member remaining who was in sheer, heartbreaking pain! Not just sandwiched, but double decker club sandwiched! I am on auto pilot and waiting to know if I will need to take my mother to the hospital A snow storm warning in effect! How is all this going to work? – Would my mom and I be stuck in a hospital away from my kids and husband in a snow storm? How sick is my mom? Frustration, anxiety…Lions and tigers and then suddenly, in tones of blue and white, I notice the word, “Shalom” cross-stitched on my mom’s physician’s office door. A door that we just happen to be right beside. A door I was pacing back and forth in front of. What are the chances? Shalom…Peace…just in the nick of time! In the midst of my personal chaos was a word I so desperately needed to be reminded of. What are the chances this word – of all words hung right before me, the very minute I needed to be reminded of it’s meaning and where it came from? WOW, just WOW! For a second I could breathe. A little later the physician came beaming down the hall with my mom’s diagnosis and a plan of what she would do to make her feel better. This smart woman with all her expertise was giving me peace! Peace that my mother was going to be better and out of pain. My daughter’s boyfriend’s parents picked her up for the game with smiling faces and eager to help in any way. They provided me with peace in that moment by helping me with her and making her happy. My eldest (who still needs me, but who is coming into his own manhood,) mustered up the energy from his sickness to pick up his own medication and even drop off money to my youngest son for food before he got a ride to the game. His maturity gave me the very essence and meaning of this holy word by helping himself and his little brother. As the nurses and doctor were helping my mother, the waters parted and I could cross over to a peaceful side of this whole situation. I am no Moses, not even close! Yet, the God of Moses is the same God of me! I am Just a mom and daughter who clumsily wears many other hats at the very same time. Who knows what sea I might be parting or what I might be doing in my life that I realize nothing about. That goes for any of us! We are mostly just trying to put one foot in front of the other. I can not do all this alone. I was shown today that peace (Shalom) is something I am given through others by God. Given through their actions, their coming of age, helpfulness, expertise, and calling. As I was driving my mom home, stopping to get her various things she needed, I yelled some explicates due to feeling impatient! feeling stubborn and determined, I had not given up on making the long drive to my son’s game to do the books for his team. My mom scolded me for using such language. I sighed and tried to defend my forty something year old self (some things never change) by explaining that sometimes the curse words just make me feel better when I say them. Then I remembered the word jewel, “Shalom” I unearthed today during my chaos. Or better yet, one that was given to me in plain sight. Along with its meaning of peace I was given through others today with their smiling faces. How blessed I was in my life’s chaotic moments. No need for foul language in tough moments when such blessings are given.